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dog drawn on rough paper hastily but with a certain elegance。 He was giving

voice to the dog; and pointing; from time to time; at the drawing。

12

I AM A DOG

As  you  can  doubtless  tell;  dear  friends;  my  canines  are  so  long  and  pointed

they barely fit into my mouth。 I know this gives me a menacing appearance;

but it pleases me。 Noticing the size of my teeth; a butcher once had the gall to

say; “My God; that’s no dog at all; it’s a wild boar!”

I  bit  him  so  hard  on  the  leg  that  my  canines  sank  right  through  his  fatty

flesh  to  the  hardness  of  his  thighbone。  For  a  dog;  you  see;  nothing  is  as

satisfying as sinking his teeth into his miserable enemy in a fit of instinctual

wrath。 When such an opportunity presents itself; that is; when my victim; who

deserves  to  be  bitten;  stupidly  and  unknowingly  passes  by;  my  teeth  twinge

and  ache  in  anticipation;  my  head  spins  with  longing  and  without  even

meaning to; I emit a hair…raising growl。

I’m a dog; and because you humans are less rational beasts than I; you’re

telling yourselves; “Dogs don’t talk。” Nevertheless; you seem to believe a story

in which corpses speak and characters use words they couldn’t possibly know。

Dogs do speak; but only to those who know how to listen。

Once upon a time; long; long ago; in a faraway land; a brash cleric from a

provincial town arrived at one of the largest mosques in a capital city; all right;

let’s call it the Bayazid Mosque。 It’d be appropriate to withhold his name; so

let’s refer to him as “Husret Hoja。” But why should I cover up anything more:

This  man  was  one  boneheaded  cleric。  He  made  up  for  the  modesty  of  his

intellect  with  the  power  of  his  tongue;  God  bless  it。  Each  Friday;  he  so

animated his congregation; so moved them to tears that some would cry until

they fainted or dried up and withered away。 Don’t get me wrong; unlike other

clerics  with  the  gift  of  preaching;  he  himself  didn’t  weep。  On  the  contrary;

while  everyone  else  cried;  he  intensified  his  oration  without  a  blink  as  if  to

chastise  the  congregation。  In  all  probability;  the  gardeners;  royal  pages;  halva

makers;  riffraff  and  clerics  like  himself  became  his  lackeys  because  they

enjoyed the tongue lashing。 Well; this man was no dog after all; no sir; he was

a human being—to be human is to err—and before those enthralled crowds;

he  lost  himself  when  he  saw  that  intimidating  throngs  of  people  was  as

pleasurable  as  bringing  them  to  tears。  When  he  understood  that  there  was

much more bread to be made in this new venture; he went over the top and

had the nerve to say the following:

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